Week 43 - Weigh In

Last week - 70.8
This Week - 70.8
No Change

I'm totally failing at this. I have no motivation what so ever, I'm not eating great, the house is full of shit food thanks to Chrisco and I'm just feeling BLAH! I don't know how to get myself back on the bandwagon. I've done it once, I SHOULD be able to do it, but it's just not happening.

My original goal when I started this journey, was to be able to fit back into my wedding dress. I reached that goal. I can walk into a normal clothes shop and buy clothes. I did what I set out to achieve, but I'm still not happy with how I look, and I know that I can do better.

I guess it's time for me to re-evaluate my goals, and work towards the next thing, whatever that might be. All i know is that I need to do this. 25kgs is no small feat, I did it and I should be proud, and I guess I am, but there is still work to be done. Get rid of these tuckshop lady arms, and this permanent apron I seem to be wearing (sexy right?)

Week 42 - Weigh In

Last week - 71.1
This week - 70.8
Loss - 300g

I've had a really crappy weekend with food, and to top it off have PMS and retention. NICE. Kinda makes you feel deflated.

I was pretty good last week too, recording my food, even exercising, but the weekend just killed it. Felt so good to get back on my bike again though, so i need to make more of an effort to do it.

I'm having trouble with food in the afternoon. come three o'clock my body crashes. I obviously don't have enough in there to keep it going, and i end up eating shit because I'm so shaky and gross. I think I am going to have to maybe have a shake again in the afternoon, just to get me through to dinner time again, like i did in the beginning.

They are predicting rain tomorrow, so I think I might go out and mow the lawn and maybe sprinkle some grass seed today.

Week 41 - Where is she? Weigh in

Well the motivation has been at an all time low, and these last couple of weeks certainly haven't made it any easier. Darren's cousin was killed in Afghanistan just over 2 weeks ago now, so it's been a very emotional and draining fortnight. Add to that kids having measles, and i'm exhausted.

I actually hadn't done too bad with food, and even dropping down to 68.7 last week, which has been my lowest. I'm currently sitting on 71.1, but that's after a really crappy weekend, and probably a lot of excess fluid/food weight. I think next week's will be a it more accurate.

Going to have to slowly start exercising again. To be honest I don't even know where to begin it's been that long. Might start out with the 15-30 mins on the bike, and do what I did in the beginning. Will have to start my food diary again too. Back to basics I think.

Darren got a fright when he got on the scales this morning as well, so i don't think it will be too hard to convince him to ramp it up a bit as well. They haven't used the gym for ages, so i'll have to give him the ultimatum of use it or get rid of it.

Here's to a better figure on the scales next week.

Week 36 - Weigh In

Last week - 69.9kgs
This week - 69.2kgs
Loss - 700g

Nearly back to where I was. This is getting really really hard and I am seriously lacking motivation. Exercise was non existant last week, yet again. I just can't bring myself to JFDI.

I've just finished 15 minutes on the x-trainer and i'm stuffed. Sweating up a storm. Nice, huh? I do feel good for doing it though, just gotta force myself to do it and sstop being so slack.

I've discovered my scales do infact go down into the 68's this week. After swimming I decided to jump on before i got into the shower, and there it was 68.9. Hasn't been seen since though! I'm sure it will get there again.

Week 35 - Weigh In

Last Week - 71.1kgs
This week - 69.9kgs
Loss 1.2kgs

Ok so these aren't totally accurate weights. School holidays haven't been great for me. I feel like I have got nothing that I set out to do acheived, and I certainly havne't exercised. I don't think i've exercised properly in nearly a month :-O I did however, enjoy spending some time with the kids, and just chilled.

So last weeks results. I guess you can see for yourself. Not great. I went up 3 kgs. from 69 neat to 71.1. The reason. Alcohol. Pure and simple. Darren and I went out to his 10 year high school reunion. I was put in a stressful situation involving my oldest son's father, and I drank maybe a few too many drinks. Do I regret it? not in the slightest. We had a wonderful night, given the circumstances, and the weight fell back off. I'm up again this weigh in, but i'm not concerned.

I jumped back on the x-trainer this morning, for the first time in what feels like forever. The first five minutes were tough. but the next 10 were ok. Didn't burn as many calories as I normally do though, and I guess i expected to burn more considering I haven't exercised for so long.

Week 33 - Weigh In

Last week - 70.2kgs
This week - 69.1kgs
LOSS - 1.1kgs

Ahhh FINALLY back down into the 60's for my weekly weigh in. Technically I haven't really lost any weight over the last few weeks, it's all been lost/gained.

I'm hoping to crack into the 68's this week though, which is do-able. I know this weekend coming isn't going to be great, as we are heading back to gympie, and have parties and reunions to go to. Kinda stressed about the whole reunion thing, but i'll get over it.

School holidays have started. At the moment i'm aiming to do my 15 minutes on the x-trainer and that's about it. The kids are being kinda feral today, but I guess that's normally the case on the first few days of holidays.

Week 32 - Weigh In

Last Week - 70.2kgs
This Week - 70.2kgs
No Change

After planning a nice quiet weekend, we ended up with unexpected visitors and spent the weekend on the go, Which apparently means that I end up with a lovely case of water/food retention. I was down to 69.1 on Friday but back to 70.2 by yesterday. I'm back down again today to 69.4. I hate the way it fluctuates so much more when you are smaller.

Still not back to doing the exercise I want to be. The energy just isn't there still, and i'm not willing to push it. I did 15 on the x-trainer yesterday, and 30 on the bike last night, and I think for now that's all I can manage.

School holidays start here at the end of the week, and I'm kind of a little nervous about it. A change in routine doesn't always mean well in the exercise department.

Frustrated

It's no secret that i've been really struggling with everything over the last little while. This week however, I was into it. Shocking, right? So you can imagine my frustration when my body decides that it needs a 'rest' and I get sick. I am sooo bummed out about it. I barely had the energy to stand for 5 minutes let alone do anything that was even slightly strenuous. I spent pretty much all Tuesday night, and Wednesday in bed, which doesn't do wonders for the feeling slack department.

Yesterday I was feeling much better, and could actually drag my butt out of bed, and got most of the house cleaned up. Apparently the house doesn't clean itself when you are sick, WHO KNEW!?

Today, I decided to ease back into the exercise. I have done 15 minutes on the cross trainer, and that will probably be it for the day (I did go swimming for 30 mins this morning too) I know that I can't push my body too far after I've been sick, cause it has a tendency to go STUFF YOU, and completely shut down on me, and I'm sick for weeks.

Weekends are usually a write off for me, with darren being home, but i'm going to do 15 on the x-trainer each day, and hopefully by monday i'll be set to go again. 65.5 kilo's i'm coming to get you.

Week 31 - Weigh In

Last week - 70.4
This week - 70.2
Loss - 200g

Not great, but unlike the last couple of weeks it isn't a gain. I knew this weekend was going to be rough, and I was right. Was down to 69.2 on Friday. Again I'm sure it's not all weight weight, more food weight and water retention, so I'm not too concerned.

I'm back to enjoying the exercise again, so it seems. I just have to tell myself to JFDI. The plan was to do 15 mins on the treadmill this morning, but i ended up walking for 30 mins and burning 200 cals. Am aiming for another 2 lots of 15 mins on the cross trainer before this afternoon, as I seem to burn more doing it that way, and hopefully the big boys will be going to the gym tonight and I can get on the bike for 30 mins as well.

We are home for the next few weekends, and don't have any planned visitors, so I'm anticipating much better results in the weigh in's. Well I'm keeping my fingers crossed anyway. Aiming for 500 grams a week, and an hour of exercise a day, even though I'm attempting up to 1.5 hours every weekday this week.

I'm still really struggling with the whole idea of strength training. I just can't bring myself to love it yet. I know being sore is meant to be a good sign, but gee I'm a sook! Going to try and up the cardio, and not worry about focusing on strength just yet. Wuss - yes, but i know i won't stick to it and I'll disappoint myself.

Week 30 - Weigh in

Last week - 69.9
This week - 70.4
GAIN - 500g

Had a bit of a rough week this week. Had my parents down for the weekend, which meant big meals and dessert, and I was sick. So while i don't think this increase is actually weight, and just food, it still sucks seeing it, as I was already bummed out about everything. So much so that i've delayed writing this nearly a whole week cause i was so annoyed.

It's now Friday, and my weight has gone back down to 69.2 which is the lowest it has been ever. We are away for the weekend again though, so we aren't going to have a lot of control over what we are fed, so i guess we will just have to make do, and deal with it.

I've been pretty good on the exercise front this week, I've been doing my time on the treadmill, and x-trainer every day, and I even got on the bike the other night. Hubby and housemate have been going to the gym of a night time, and I must admit that it's been pretty good to be able to have that me time back at night time like I did when hubster was away in Adelaide.

Will hopefully be back on Monday, with a much better weigh in than the last 2 weeks.

Week 29 - Weigh In

Last week - 69.7kgs
This week - 69.9kgs
GAIN - 200g

Totally not surprised, AT ALL. I'm not feeling very motivated at all at the moment. The spark has faded a bit. I think i've been working so hard at this for what feels like ages now, and it feels like it is never going to "end". I mean, I know it's not going to end as such, that it is something that I have to continue, but the counting calories gets very repetitive and kinda drives me nuts at the moment. I still keep a rough idea of how many calories I have eaten, but at this stage I NEED to keep it written down.

I got my heart rate monitor during the week. I guess there is good and bad things about it. The good thing is that it reckons i burn more calories than FS says I do with daily everyday activities, but it says that I burn less than what FS does when i exercise. This has kinda bummed me out big time. The whole time thinking I was smashing up the exercise, and well really i wasn't! Hasn't really helped the whole 'stuff this' attitude.

I know I need to keep plodding along. Exercise was non-existent last week really, due to sick kids and photoshoots. Darren and Whit have just started going to the gym every second night, so I'm going to attempt the bike at night time again, well every second night anyway. During the day I will try and do 15 on the treadmill and 15 on the x-trainer. Just wish i could get some of that commitment back that I had, and everything wasn't such a struggle.

I'm no where near finished my journey yet, so there isn't time to be slacking off. Maybe if i can get back into the exercise mode, everything will fall back into place. Fingers crossed.

Week 28 - Weigh In

Last fortnight - 71.5kgs
This week - 69.7
Loss for fortnight - 1.8kgs

Wow - Haven't I been quite the slack blogger!!! I've been feeling pretty "MEH" about things for the last couple of weeks/months, and it was really getting me down. I felt like I was focusing on what i was eating and how much i was exercising, and forgetting about the things that really matter, like family. It seems to have taken me forever to lose the last 3 kilo's and it was driving me batty. My motivation was slipping, i was beginning to think why bother putting all this work in if it's not getting me anywhere. No matter what I did, I just couldn't break past that 70kg mark.

WELL, on Saturday, I DID IT. 69.9 flashed up on the scales. Normally weekends are pretty much a write off for me weight wise. I generally go up, and retain lots. For the first time in forever, this week I didn't. My weight this morning was yet again down, at 69.7kgs. I'm pretty thrilled with that, and now i'm on to my next goal of reaching 25kgs lost. That means getting to a weight of 65.5.

If you had have said 7 months ago that I would EVER be in the 60's again, I would have laughed at you. I was sure that I could never be anything but fat, I'd been that way for so long. But, it CAN change, and it HAS changed. Do I still see myself as being fat, yes., but I am getting closer and closer to that happy place. My belly is still big, and i guess after 4 babies, it's bound to be flabby, but that is something i can work on. The tops of my arms and legs are still flabby, but I'm still considered to be overweight. I think due to how much they have been stretched they will still be somewhat flabby, but I can now see some muscle definition in my legs, and that's something i haven't seen in a long time.

I've gone from a size 22+ down to a 12 in most things. I should be very proud of what i have achieved, and not dwell on what i haven't yet. It will all come in time!

6 Months!!!

Lots of changes during the last 6 months, and definitely for the better! I'm gonna let the photos speak for themselves!

Body & Face Changes - 6 Months In - 20 kgs down.

Major Goal - To get back into my wedding dress......

On, done up, not particularly flattering, but it's ON!

Week 26 - Weigh in

Last week - 71.6kgs
This week - 71.5kgs
Loss - 100 grams

I'm really glad that i took the pics of the scales when I did, cause I'd be really disappointed about my weigh in this week if i didn't. It also makes me very glad that I weigh in every day, cause I don't think I'd cope real well seeing only a 100 gram loss after all the effort that I put in during the week.

So it appears my body is holding on to everything that it possibly can at the moment. A 1.1kg weight increase in 3 days? I don't think so! I've been having toilet issues for the last week, and am really struggling going. TMI, I know, but i think it's playing a rather large part of it. I feel very bloated and quite gross. I've put off doing my measurements, because of this fact, and will do them when things settle down again.

I'm a little disappointed that my 6 month weight isn't under the 20kg mark like it should be, but I know that I reached it before the time frame, now the next step is to get under 70!

One of my big main goals since even before I started losing weight, was to get back into my wedding dress again. Last night I achieved that goal! Mum and dad were down for the night, so I got mum to help me get it on. I didn't think that I would be able to get it done all the way up still, but I DID! I do have a photo of it, well mum does, so when she gives it to me I'll post it. Sure it's certainly not as flattering as it was on my wedding day, but it's on, and i'm pretty happy with that!

I did it!! 20kgs down!!

Finally! Jumped in the scales this morning ti be greeted by this.... 20.1 kgs down and 500 grams to go until i see a 6 at the start of the scales!! So excited!!!

Week 25 - Weigh In

Last week - 71.5Kgs
This Week - 71.6Kgs
GAIN - 100 grams

Feeling pretty disappointed in myself right about now :( No one else to blame here for gaining weight except for myself. I know 100 grams isn't much, and there are probably a lot of contributing factors, but it's still a gain.

As I said in my last post, I feel like I have been stuck around here forever, and I just don't know how to get past it. It's been a big week, with Madi's birthday, and other birthday parties, but i really don't believe that's the culprit. I think it's the whole lack of meal planning and snacking that has been my downfall. I'm normally pretty good with the whole planning thing, I know what we are eating for the next fortnight generally, but for the last fortnight the plan didn't get done and I'm paying for it. Shopping day is Wednesday, so I have today and tomorrow to go through my cupboards, see what we have available, and make a new plan. I absolutely HATE having to organise what we are going to do for dinner each and ever night, so if i do up a list, once a fortnight, and stick to it, it makes the afternoons a whole lot more pleasant. It also helps our shopping bill, cause this running to the shops to grab something every 2nd afternoon business has not helped our bank account AT ALL.

So I guess my goal this week, is to try and get on top of life, exercise and food. It's been a massive struggle with everything lately, and it's really getting me down. I'm going to start tracking my calories again, and trying to do my 3 lots of exercises 5 times a week. I only have a week left to lose 1.1kgs, to get to my 20kgs in 6 months goal, and i don't think it's going to be do-able :(

Week 24 - Weigh in

Last week - 72.7kgs
This week - 71.5kgs
Loss - 1.2kgs

Ahhh for the first time in a month i've moved out of the 72's! Gosh it feels like it has taken me forever to get over the 72 hurdle. I guess it has all been self inflicted, with not eating and exercising like I should have been, but hey, everyone needs a break occasionally.

So today marks my 19th Kilo gone. 1 kilo to that magical 20 and 1.6kgs till the even better numbers that begin with a 6. 3 weeks, fingers crossed till I see that.

In 2 weeks I will have been on this journey for a full 6 months. I'm not going to measure between now and then, and i'm really hoping that I can break that 20kg barrier at the same time.

Week 23 - Weigh In

Last week - 72.5kgs
This Week - 72.7kgs
GAIN - 200g

OMG my first ever weekly gain. :-0 I know I should be shocked but i'm really not. We've been on school holidays away at the beach and diet and exercise were pretty much the last thing on my mind. I needed some 'ME' time, and time off all the counting. I really missed the lack of exercise, and can't wait to get back into it this week though. I seriously need to work on my organisational skills, and get some kind of routine happening. I'm not very good in that department!

I got the new implanon put in on Wednesday just gone. Until today, all i saw was gain, gain, gain. I was FREAKING OUT! I know the increased hormone is going to mess me around for a couple of weeks, but i AM going to beat this and still continue to lose weight with it in.

I've decided to stop doing my measurements every week, and am going to do them every month from now on. The reason being is that now i'm getting smaller, I'm not seeing the big numbers that I used to, and it gets me down. I know that the numbers are going to get smaller, but when it starts to play with your mind it's time to take a break!

On other news, during my holidays it was my birthday and I went clothes shopping! I ended up coming home with SIZE 12 CLOTHES!!! I don't think i'm quite there in the pants department just yet, but it won't be too far off. At the beach I tried on a pair of my Mum's size 8 pants. 6 months ago i couldn't get an 18 up over my thighs and done up, so imagine mu surprise when i got these on!!! Now it certainly wasn't flattering, and they were TIGHT, but they were ON. lol. This then prompted me telling my mother i was coming to get her and soon her cool wardrobe was going to be invaded by me. She was pretty excited about that, she can't wait till we are able to share clothes again.

A week later, I come home after our holiday, to find 2 garbage bags full of Mum's clothes waiting for me on my bed! Even before our conversation, she had taken all the clothes that she didn't want, and left them for me! Some people might think i'm silly for wanting to wear my mothers clothes, but she dresses pretty cool for a 50 year old. I always told her that I had to dress how she is meant to dress, and she dressed how I was meant to dress, so now i can start to look young and funky again too, and not like a grandma! Most of her clothes were a size 10-12, and i can get a few of them on, and hopefully it won't be too long till i can get ALL of them on.

I think that is just about all my news over the last 2 weeks! All caught up!

Week 21 - Weigh In

Last Week - 73kgs
This Weel - 72.6kgs
Loss 400 grams

We've had a really rough week food wise this week, so i'm kinda glad that there is a loss at all. Had a funeral, birthday party, and days out here there and everywhere, all with limited choices in food. Still managed to lose though, and i'm pretty proud of that.

On thursday I got down to 71.9, which is the lowest I have ever been, and I think once all this food leaves my system I'll be around that again too.

The best part of all? I am now OFFICIALLY no longer "obese" simply "overweight" While I have still got a long way to go before I get to the "normal" category, I am pretty damned pleased with myself that I have managed to go down a whole category. My next aim is to get to 69.9 Kgs, and i'm hoping to do that in the next 4 weeks. I WANNA SEE A 6 AT THE START OF THE SCALES!!!!

Still not really any progress with the exercise. Not only is Darren home from Adelaide now, he's also on holidays from work for the next 2 weeks. I'm much preferring to spend my days snuggling on the couch with him rather than exercising, but I really shouldn't. We generally go for walks at night though.

On other good (and some not so good) news. My biggest boy finally got the go ahead today that he no longer needs to wear his plate. He had one to push a top tooth out from behind his bottom tooth, and it has done the job after 6 months. He is thrilled, as am I, cause i hated the constant nagging about putting it in. The bad news is, however, that over the next couple of years we are going to have to fork out a LOT of money on orthodontics. OUCH!!!

Have a great week!

Motivation

I just stumbled across this quote in one of the forums i frequent, and thought I'd share. It's so true....

In the beginning the journey feels so long because you don't know when it will end but when you reach the other side it suddenly feels like it was over in no time at all and was worth every cent of the effort you put in! Take heart and take up the challenge!

Week 20 - Weigh In

Last week - 73.5kgs
This week - 73.0kgs
Loss - 500 Grams

Can't say that I am at all surprised with seeing only 500 grams. While i love having Darren home everynight, i'm really struggling to find my exercise routine again. I used to get on the treadmill and x-trainer at around 2pm and then do my bike after the kids go to bed around 7.30, but with him home, i much prefer to spend time with him, and we quite often go for a walk after dinner.

So this week I am trialling my bike riding at about 10ish, followed by tready/x-trainer at 2ish, and then after dinner we can either chill or go for our walk/jog.

Will let you know how that turns out lol. I just need to find my rhythm again.

Don't think much else is happening in the world of Lauren. Pretty boring all round really!

Week 19 - Measurements

As I suspected, no loss really on the measurement front this week. I guess 1cm is still 1 cm, even if it was from my boobs!

Week 19 - Weigh In

Last Week - 74.1Kgs
This week - 73.5Kgs
Loss - 600 Grams

Loss this week should technically have been a lot more than this, but I had a pretty up and down weekend with food. Thursday and friday saw me retaining everything I possibly could and the scales going up quite considerably, and Saturday was dinner out with my sister for her birthday. No one to blame but myself, even though i'm not feeling terribly guilty about it. I knew it was going to happen, i was prepared for it to happen, and I haven't fallen off the wagon. If I can't go out and enjoy myself once in a blue moon, then i'm never going to stick to this.

On a positive note, my Dad told me how great I was looking, and that I was half the woman i once was. Anyone who knows my dad, knows that he NEVER says anything like that, so he must be pretty proud of me!

On more great news.... Darren is home from Adelaide for good. Felt so good seeing him this morning, and I'm LOVING the fact that he is going to be home for dinner tonight. Madi is also pretty excited, which is great.

Measurements again tomorrow, but i'm not expecting a change at all to be honest.

xoxo

Week 18 - Measurements

Measurements sure have been going slow lately, but i guess that is to be expected as you get smaller! This is my last week of Darren being away, and I'm rather excited about it. Can't wait to have him home again, and have someone to motivate me actually IN the same house. WOOOOHOOO!! Anyways, here's the chart!

Week 18 - Weigh In

Last week - 75.0 kgs
This week - 74.1 Kgs
Loss - 900 Grams

As I explained last week, i'm not really sure what the actual weight for last week was as my scales weren't reading right, but I know they are reading right now, and i'm down to 74.1 kgs.

I ended up having quite a good week last week, and started to come to terms with the fat that i have actually lost weight and it is noticeable. Crossroads had a 70% off sale one day last week, so i went down bright and early to grab me some bargains. I ended up getting about $370 worth of clothes for $100, so i was pretty happy with that. All the clothes were size 14, except one size 12 shirt, and it fits too!

So due to getting a heap of new clothes, that actually fit me and don't look like a circus tent on me anymore, I decided to have a cull from my cupboard. This was the result..........
That's 6.5 garbage bags full of clothes that no longer fit! I'm almost certain i could have thrown out more too, but my cupboard was looking mighty bare! It also prompted a clean out of Darren's cupboards, and he's got another 2 bags full of his clothes. I'm so proud of him. He's gone from a tight size 40, to a 34, this year. He's running again, and looks pretty darn sexy, even if i do say so myself :-) It must be time to go on a shopping spree for him soon though, he's get very few pair of pants that actually fit him. We are heading down the the gold coast in a couple of weeks, so shall try and get him some new clothes at the factory outlets down there.

We discovered the other day, that between us, we have lost the weight equivalent of our oldest and youngest children. 40 odd kilo's! Now it's my job to knock off the weight of the middle child, so an extra 22 kilo's! I'm not sure i could even do that, as my goal is 60, so 14 kgs, but darren could possibly make up the slack lol.

What else is news. Hmmmmm, exercise. I think i pushed it a little too hard last week. I ended up with really sore knees and shins, to the point that i couldn't run. I am really struggling with this week on C25K. It involves a 5 min warm up, followed by a 90 second jog, 90 seconds walk, 3 minute jog, 3 mins walk, and repeat the jog/walk stage once more. I think I am going to be stuck on this week for a few weeks. I completed the first day, but failed miserably at the other 2 days. I'm going to be trying again this week, but i will not be allowing myself to move on until i can do it three times in a row.

I am considering moving the bed out of the office, and putting all the exercise equipment in there. The cross trainer is huge though, and i'm not certain i will actually be able to get it in there. It currently lives in the garage, and boy does it get hot in there. Would be nice to have everything together in a room though, and out of the living areas. We'll have to see how it all pans out, it's way too much work to do on my own!

SIZE 14!!!!!!

On Monday I said I was going to go and try on a size 14 pair of jeans, cause I didn't believe that I was actually a 14 yet. You can see the results for yourself ^^^^^^!!!!

Size 14 Target SKINNY Jeans!! and a size 14 top too! I've still got my belly happening, but shit, I haven't got into a size 14 since I was MARRIED 7 YEARS AGO!!!! I'm pretty damned proud of myself right now!!!

Week 17 - Measurements

SOOOO, it seems that my scales were lying to me on Monday. Here I was thinking that I did really well, when honestly i did really quite crap. Obviously I cant give a definite figure for what my weight should have been, but it was no where near what the scales told me. I've estimated it to be around the 85 mark, but that's purely a guess.

So what happened? It appears that at some stage my scales were kicked/moved/tripped over (anything is possible with kids really) and the battery cover has come off the back and one of the batteries has half fallen out. While the batteries didn't seem to make a difference, not having the tiniest corner of the battery cover under the edge of the scale certainly did. So i've adjusted my weight in the side panel, but i'm leaving my last post. I will correct it in next week's weigh in.

Disappointment probably doesn't even come close to how i was feeling when i discovered what had happened, and i'm not going to lie, it made me wonder why i was putting myself through this. My motivation for everything has been at an all time low since coming back from Adelaide, I have a serious case of the "can't be bothered" bug. I REALLY can't wait till Darren comes home for good (meant to be the end of next week) and he can kick my arse again. I need it. Majorly.

I realised earlier in the week that I didn't take my monthly progress photos, so I did it this morning. Even though my brain is taking a mighty long time to wake up to the fact that I have indeed lost weight, the proof is in the photos themselves. Instead of beating myself up about only losing a few hundred grams, I should be proud of the fact that I have come so far in such a short time. Here they are. (click on them if you are game to see them bigger!)


Look My back boobs are nearly gone!!!

Week 17 - Weigh in

Last week - 75.3kgs
This week - 74.2kgs
Loss - 1.1kgs

I really wasn't expecting such a big loss this week. As i said in the last post, we had a really really rough week this past week, and life in general was just plain difficult. I'm physically and mentally exhausted, and I'm really looking forward to being able to go away for a week over the June holidays, and just get away from it all. After 8 months of Darren being away and me having no down time, its definitely time to chill.

Gotta pick up my exercise game this week. I WILL do..... C25k (week 3 - Monday Wednesday and friday, with an outdoor one on the weekend with darren) Michelle bridges strength training (tuesday and thursday) and hop on my bike every night for half an hour, and find time for the xtrainer as well. I usually do that as my cool down after the run. I'm going to get to 10 mins on that one this week. That is my goal. I normally only do the 5 min cool-down, but i know i can keep going.

I've been feeling pretty down about how my body hasn't seemed to change for the last little while, well i can't notice the differences anyway, like i could before. Darren and I took the kids shopping on Saturday so that Lachlan could buy something for his birthday. While in the shops i tried on 2 jumpers, and BOTH were a size 14!!! BOTH of them fit! Snug, but dang that's bloody close! I have also bought 3 pairs of size 14 leggings this week, but they are leggings and stretchy so I don't really count them! I am going to go and try on a size 14 pair of jeans though, to see how they fit. Will keep you posted on how that goes!

So here's to this week, and increasing my fitness again. xoxo

Week 16 - Measurements

I realised after i posted on Monday that I hadn't put up my measurements for last week. Whoops. Lucky they are on this one!

I'm REALLY hitting a wall at the moment. My eating hasn't been great, still under calorie limits, but the portion sizes have been increasing, especially at dinner time. I need to get back on top of this, cause the guilts are too much for me to handle at the moment. I'm struggling with everything, not just diet and exercise wise, with life in general. It's been a really rough few weeks since we have come home from Adelaide, this week especially, and i've seen some old habits come back which I really didn't want to.

On Monday afternoon, our house very quickly came down with a vomiting bug. First Madi, totally out of the blue, followed by lachie an hour later, Whit about an hour and a half after that, and Luke about an hour later again. It was the worst bug i have seen in quite some time. It hit sooo hard and fast it scared me. Constant, and i mean constant vomiting for about 9 hours straight. I ended up with a yucky stomach, but never actually threw up thank god.

It did stop me from eating a great deal for 24 hours though, and i think i'm paying the price for it now! When I was finally able to eat again, i gained 400 grams, and haven't been able to budge it since. I also haven't exercised since monday, and that is playing on my mind as well.

BFF has been extremely busy with work, study and life, that we haven't been doing a great deal to keep each other motivated. I really hate the feeling that I am sinking on all levels, so need to get my arse into gear and stop the excuses again.

I've done awesome to get this far, and I AM going to keep going. First up for me today is swimming lessons with Madi (who's idea was it to do swimming lessons in winter?) I will also be doing week 2 day 3 of c25k on the tready, and going for a 30 min bike ride. Housework wise, at least try and make this place look presentable for when darren gets home tonight. A house full of sick people all week certainly hasn't helped.

Week 16 - Weigh in

Last week - 76.6kgs
This week - 75.3kgs
Loss - 1.3 kgs

That's more like it! I'm now officially half way in my 'journey' and i must admit, it feels pretty good! Never in a million years did I think that I would be able to lose 5 kgs let alone 15! I'm feeling pretty nervous about 20 though, seems like sooo much, even though it's less than 5kgs away.

I still don't see a big change when i look in the mirror, and that's kind of disappointing, but I have a lot to lose, so it is going to take time.

I think nutrition wise i am going ok, i'm staying under my calorie limits. I need to work more on my strength though. That's the bit that hurts! Trying the 12WBT workout guidelines this week to see how we go. Will keep you posted!

Week 15 - Weigh in

Last week - 77.1
This week - 76.6
Loss - 500 Grams

Could think of a million excuses as to why it was only 500 grams, but truth is I didn't eat right on the weekend, and 600 grams is the result of it. Now to be honest, I don't think it is actual weight, just food weight, but gee it sure does make you feel crappy!

Weighing in on a monday sucks big time!!

Week 14 - Measurements

Feels odd seeing a new chart! Loss in cms this week was 7.5. I'm pretty happy with that. Most of it from my hips down, so that's even better. I guess that's the extra walking/jogging I had been doing this week. HAD being the key word......

After all the excitement over my treadmill yesterday, My housemate got on the tready to have a go yesterday, and it stopped on him. It won't start now. :( I'm sooo devastated. Something is shorting out in it. I have it for 3 days and I manage to break it. GOOOO ME! NOT! He was talking about getting his sparky mate to come and look at it this afternoon, but I think in the end I am going to have to call in the Cardiotech team, and that's gonna cost me some dollars. I hope it's not out of action for too long. I was really really enjoying it!

Week 14 - Weigh in

Last week - 77.5
This week - 77.1
Loss - 400g

Kinda disappointed about this number, but i only have myself to blame. Salty chips on the beach for lunch on saturday, along with cornmeat for dinner (always makes me put on weight) and then out to dinner for dinner on Sunday for Mothers day. Dinner on sunday wasn't bad though, Grilled chicken breast with a creamy white wine sauce, a couple of chips and a salad. Wouldnt have gone anywhere near my calorie limit.

My present for mothers day from my wonderful family was a treadmill. Yep i finally convinced him. We saw one advertised for $550 up the coast, and ended up paying $500 for it. Not bad considering the condition is pretty much new, and it retails for $2500!

I've done 2 days of the c25k running program (am only going to do it every second day) and alternate every other day with a brisk walk with varying inclines for half an hour. I will then do half an hour on the bike of an evening as well.

I'm pretty nervous about my measurements this week, seeing as though i've only lost 400 grams, and the numbers the last 2 weeks have been terrible on higher losses.

Week 13 - Measurements

An updated chart!!!!

Loss of 5cms this week. Kinda disappointed at that, was expecting something a bit higher, but i guess that's what no exercise does to you! Started back on the bike again last night, and could possibly be getting a treadmill over the weekend, so i'm pretty excited about that!

Week 13 - Weigh In

Last week: 78.7 kgs
This week: 77.5 kgs
Loss: 1.2 kgs

REALLY wasn't expecting this this week. I had only lost 300 grams as of yesterday, only to wake up this morning and a massive 900 GRAMS gone! Makes getting back into the swing of things seem all worthwhile after holidays!!

My big achievement this week was doing week one day one of (W1D1) of couch to 5 k running program. I completed the entire session. This involves a 5 min warm up followed by 20 mins of alternating between 1 minute of jogging and 1.5 minutes walking. Now this might not seem very big to most people, but last time I attempted to do the C25K I failed miserably, only completing the first 2 jogging sections, lasting under 10 mins.

I'm pretty proud of myself, and I can't wait till my hubby is back in the state for good so that I can go out with him of a night time. Going out by myself is just way too scary, and going in the day time is not an option. I'm too embarrassed.

Kinda makes my goal of running in the bridge to Brisbane seem a little more like it will happen one day!!

Week 12 - weigh in and measurements

Last week - 79.9
This week - 78.7
Loss - 1.2kgs

Still away in holidays. Doing much better than i expected and still losing weight sick that's a bonus. My goal is to go home the same weight as when i came and i think that is going to be achievable. Haven't lost a great deal but its better than nothing. I know that just by going home the difference between darrens and my scales is going to add an extra 400 grams on to me. Looking forward to getting home and doing my 12 week photos as well. Can't believe I've stuck to this for 12 weeks and lost 12 kgs and over a meter on measurements!! (only 4.2cms this week) Will put the chart up after i get home.

Week 11 - weigh in and measurements

Last week - 80.6 kgs
This week - 79.9 kgs
Loss - 700 grams
Measurements - loss of 6.2cms

We are away on our holidays now so this is an update from my phone. No flash pictures or anything. How boring am i! Im not actually disappointed with this weeks figures cause i don't think they are very accurate. I had a gain of 500 grams on Monday morning and that is because of girl issues. On Sunday i was sitting at 79.4 and Tuesday i was down to 79.1 so i obviously had some retention happening there. Anyway it Will all work itself out.

Im not feeling very in control of things here. I'm not tracking my calories cause its too hard, so Im just keeping a rough guestimate in my head. The only exercise Im getting at present is walking but there is quite a bit of that involved! We are out a lot over the Easter weekend so i know there are going to be some gains. My aim is to return to qld at the same weight i left at. If i can do that ill be happy!

Week 10 - Measurements

Pretty good numbers again this week (9.3cms lost) considering the weight loss has been so slow lately. I guess that could probably mean that I am gaining muscle somewhere under there, which is why the weight isn't coming off like it used to. I can definitely feel muscles where there never used to be any!

I am certainly glad that I started taking measurements from the start, cause it really shows me just how far i have come, especially in times when i'm down.

The scales this morning showed a neat 80kgs. I'm 100 grams off being in the 70's and i am totally thrilled with that.

I came to the realisation the other day that I put on 10kgs for each child I had. After Lachlan I weighed 60kgs, After Luke I weight 70kgs and after Madi i was 80kgs. Then after my stint in hospital, I ended up a massive 93kgs. That's a lot on a 5'2" body! So as of now I am back to pre-Madi weight, now the goal is to get to pre-luke weight and fit back into my wedding dress!

Bring on the 70's!!

Week 10 - Weigh in

Last week: 81.4kgs
This week: 80.6kgs
Loss - 800 grams

Argh i'm so frustrated with this. I was down my 10kgs, and now i'm back up again. For the month of april i have lost a massive 400 grams, and i'm getting really really disappointed. Feels like everything is at a standstill, and its beginning to make me wonder why i am even bothering.

I don't want to be in this mindframe anymore, just get the scales moving again

10 Kgs GONE

Just because I had a bit of a whinge yesterday, this morning saw me drop 80.5, giving me my 10kg loss! I was sooooo thrilled. My next mini goal is to get to 75.5 but first of all seeing a 7 at the start of the scales is going to be AWESOME

A group of us started this journey around the same time and together we have lost 66kgs in around 12 weeks. Darren has lost a MASSIVE 20kgs, out housemate has lost 12kgs, I've lost 10, My bestie has lost 8 and her hubby 10, and housemates sister has lost 6. I'm so proud of our "Team Big Losers" It sure does help when you have a support network around you that's for sure!

Struggling

I feel like i have been sitting just out of reach from that 10kg mark for weeks now. I'm 200 grams away, and no matter what i'm doing, its just not getting any closer. I know it will come, but gosh it sure is taking it's time. I REALLY want to be in the 70's REAL soon!

I think I am going to start adding another exercise in, as well as my ride of a night time. I did Jillian Michaels 30 day shred AGES ago, and she kicked my butt so hard that I never attempted it again. Well I think it might be about time to have a rematch. I know she is gonna kick me again, but I can do it. I have her Kettlebell workout as well, but need to invest in a kettlebell before I do that!

Week 9 - Measurements

OMG OMG OMG!!! I've cracked the ONE METRE Mark!!!! In 9 weeks I've lost just over 9 kgs, and 101.2 cms!!!!

I decided to go into target this morning and try on a pair of size 16 jeans. THEY FIT, well kinda lol. They fit where they are meant to around the waist, but me being incredibly short, means they were a mile too long ROFL. YAY to fitting into a 16 though! That's a long way from a 20-22 9 weeks ago!!!

Week 9 - Weigh In

Last week - 82.3 kgs
This week - 81.4 kgs
Loss this week: 900g

Feeling kinda deflated this week. I was doing really well, but yet again, going away for the weekend saw me go up in weight. I know that I'm still eating under my calorie limits, and that the extra weight is just what is in my digestive system, but it still sucks! I was 500 grams away from losing 10 kgs, and now i am a kilo away from it again. Very disheartening.

I am home for 2 weeks straight now though, so hopefully we will have some better results over the next couple of weeks. I'm a little bit apprehensive about what is going to happen after that though, as we are flying to Adelaide for 2 weeks to spend some time with Darren. I know i will still be in control of what is being cooked and what we eat so that is a good thing I guess.

So here's to a better couple of weeks than the last two. Pretty sure there is going to be disappointment in the measurement department tomorrow too :(

Unusual Changes

This week mark my 2 month milestone. I don't think i've ever stuck to anything like this for more than maybe a few days, so you can't really describe that as trying to lose weight can you?

I thought it would be good for me to write down some of the changes that I have noticed over the last 2 months. Some of them seem a little strange to me, but changes are changes and i'll take them!

* CLOTHING SIZES - Before starting I was struggling to get into size 20 shirts (my belly was the issue), and size 22 pants. Now 8 weeks in, my size 18 jeans are starting to fall down, and require constant pulling up, so must nearly be into a 16 but not actually game to try some on in fear of disappointment! Shirts - I'm down to a size 16 most of the time. My sister bought a whole heap of clothes the other day, so I tried them on just to see, and most of them fit. WOOHOO!

* SHOES - I'm not a huge shoe person. I have one pair of dressy 'thongs' and a pair of joggers that i wear. Joggers are fine, my thongs however, are too big. Length wise they are ok, but my foot has apparently got heaps skinnier, and they now flop around almost to the point of not being able to wear them anymore. Can anyone say devastated LOL Better be going and getting me the next size down lol.

* NECK - This one hasn't really come apparent to me until today when I took some 2 month photos. My neck has shrunk quite a bit. Sure I still have that double chin (triple? you get it) but it isn't nearly as prominent as it used to be. You can see for yourself in the photo that I'll put up at the end of this.

* THE APRON - Ahhh that dreaded bit of hanging belly, you know that one that flops over the top of your clothes, or the one you diligently tuck into your clothes so its not sooooo obvious? Mine is definitely getting smaller (again see photos) but i was kinda horrified when I took my photo this morning and it actually looks like its folding more than normal :-0 Scary stuff. I'm very excited about the fact that I'm losing weight and everything, but gee this apron is scaring me stiff. My belly has been stretched to buggery, and i'm TERRIFIED of it hanging around

* SCARS - Yeah how's this for an odd one LOL. A couple of years ago I had a few surgeries, to remove my gall bladder, and appendix, as well as a one because of some complications. Because of this I have quite a few scars across my tummy. Not huge ones, about 8 smaller ones and a slightly bigger one at my belly button. Last night, while in the shower, I realised that the 2 main ones (belly button and the one at the top of my belly) are no where near as big as they used to be. AND some of the smaller ones I can barely see at all! I'm pretty thrilled at that, although it really wasn't something that I thought would happen. It just never crossed my mind!

I'm sure there are probably heaps of other little things that I have missed, so as I notice i'll have to start writing them down, but they are my big changes for this week LOL

Week 8 - Measurements

Measurements weren't too great this week. I knew they wouldn't be because of the lack of exercise and only dropping 200 grams, so i guess 6cms is still pretty good. Brings my total to 88 cms, inching ever so closer to that magic 1 meter mark!

Here they are:-

Week 8 - Weigh in Day

Weight last week: 82.5kg
Weight this week: 82.3kg
Loss this 233k: 200 grams

Normally I would be hugely disappointed at this number, and i guess to a degree i'm a little bummed, but i'm not going to let it get me down.

I've had an absolutely MASSIVE week this week. I haven't been home during the day for a single day of it. The first part of the week was spent on the Gold Coast participating in an awesome photography workshop, Saturday was spent with Darren getting our boat and jetski licenses, and sunday was spent out on the dam with the ski.

I have had pretty much no control over meals this week, with lunch being organised through the course, and darren organising dinner of a night time. I've eaten a lot more bread than I would normally have, and I think that's been the issue. I've kept within my calorie limits still though, so I really don't think its weight as such, I think its just food in my system still, a bit like water weight.

Today is my get back on track day, and i'm also getting back into my exercise. I WILL be doing my 30 mins on the bike every night this week, and i'm going to go for 2 walks of a morning as well. Probably tomorrow and thursday.

Having mot done a huge amount of exercise last week, i've felt really sluggish, and i'm itching to get back into it. I'm contemplating even getting all the running around done this morning, and jumping on my bike before the kids get home from school this afternoon. We will see how that pans out.

Here's to a more in control week this week!

Week 7 - Measurements

A bit of a late post. I've been away on a photography course all week, so i haven't had a chance to post my measurements from last week. I'm down another 12 cms, which is awesome. Here are the results

Week 7 - Weigh in Day

Last week: 83.6kgs
This week: 82.5kgs
Lost this week: 1.1kgs

This week has been the hardest to date. My emotions have been all over the place and i've REALLY struggled. There was many nights spent on calls to Darren crying because nothing has been happening, or text messages to Jayne for some encouragement. It's been pretty rough.

I've managed to lose 800 grams over the last 2 days, which has put me back in a better mindset.

I'm a little concerned about how i'm going to go this week, as I am away on a photography course for 4 days, and lunch is provided. I'm not sure what lunch is going to be, and darren will be in charge of dinners, but i know they will be ok too.

I'm REALLY excited about attending this workshop. This lady has been a huge inspiration for me since the beginning, and I'm thrilled that I am able to have the opportunity to get taught by her.

Frustrated

Frustrated can't even begin to describe how i am feeling at the moment. After 6 weeks of losing quite good numbers, i'm sure my scales hate me. Nothing is moving, not even measurements. I've worked my butt off for the last week, and have eaten really well (until KFC yesterday, but that was totally planned)

I can totally understand why people fall off the wagon when they get to their plateau. So many times over the last 2 weeks i've wanted to chuck it all in and tell the world to get stuffed. I feel like I am never going to get past 83, let alone into the 70's. My weight this morning, is still more than what the other sets of scales were telling me in Gympie, but the Wii fit is telling me the same thing as my scales, so that can't be the issue.

I'm beyond frustrated, and it's put me in a super bad mood all week. Jayne is feeling pretty much the same as me at the moment too, and here i am trying to encourage her, while all the while wanting to curl up in a corner with a big block of chocolate. Hypocrite much?

Hmmmm

For the first time today in 6.5 weeks, I had KFC. I'm at a total standstill with my weight again this week, despite working my butt off with exercise. I am still going to be well and truly under my calorie limit for the day, but i can't believe i used to eat it all the time. Within an hour of eating it, i had a massive headache. Might just be pure coincidence but i'm not so sure. It's made me incredibly thirsty as well.

Now i have no idea about these weight loss plateau's that I hear about, but they say increasing your calorie limit and shocking your system is one way to try and get off them. I'm not convinced this is going to work at all, but i'm giving it a go. Here's to another 6 weeks of no KFC!

Week 6 - Measurements day!

OMG OMG OMG! I've had my biggest loss to date with my measurements, and i still can't really believe it!!! 19.5 CMS IN ONE WEEK!!!!!!! Brings my total to 70 cms in just 6 short weeks!!!!!! I can't even begin to tell you how happy I am with that result. I wasn't expecting it AT ALL! My waist and thighs are now officially under 100cms and it feels GREAT!!! I have lost a massive 10% of my measurements already! Can you tell i'm excited!!!

Here's the chart:

On another WOOHOO Note, Darren has reached his goal, and came in under 100kgs this morning. I am soooooo proud of him, and he's pretty chuffed with himself this morning too!

Go team Loser ROFL!!!

Weigh in Day - Week 6

Previous Week: 84.6kgs
This week: 83.6kgs
Loss this week: 1 kg

Well after my last post about being pretty disappointed in not losing anything all week, I was pleasantly surprised when I jumped on the scales this morning to find that I was down 1 kg. That being said though, I think my scales might be starting to die, so i'm trying to convince darren to bring his back with him next week when he is here for the week. I'll compare them then and see how they go.

Argh

After a great start to the week, with measurements and weight, i'm having a crappy day.

Since Monday I have lost a whole 100 grams, and i'm working my butt off. Makes me feel pretty deflated really. I sure hope that I can at least lose some cms this week, but i'm not even hopeful on that.

My body is chucking a mental on me, by trying to be girly again, please don't go back to week on week off. I don't know whether that is the reason for the weight holding on to, whether i am building up muscle, of i'm just plateau-ing. I mean I normally have a big week followed by a small week, but 100 grams in 5 days? Are you for real?

We are heading away for the weekend again, but we are staying with Jayne as we have a wedding to photograph on Saturday at Rainbow Beach. Even though we eat really good at Jayne's, I'm still thinking that this week, is going to be the first week in 6 weeks that I actually put ON weight, and that to me is devastating :(

I know i'm not going to be exercising like I have been on the weekend, so i've already been for a walk this morning, I'm about to go to swimming lessons, and i'm HOPING that I will get a chance to jump on the bike for half an hour before I have to leave.

So wish me luck that I DO actually record a loss this week, even though I know it isn't going to be a very big one. A loss is still a loss.

A good feeling

Doing my measurements this morning i decided to check just how far i had come. Here's the proof Im doing something right!

and i can't believe I am doing this, for real. AHHHHHH!

Week 5: Measurements

I think the chart pretty much speaks for itself this week. I've lost a total of 50cms from my body in just 5 short weeks. That's HALF A METER!!!

Feeling very awesome this morning!

My List of Goals

I've been saying since I started this blog that I need to set my List of Goals. So today I'm doing it. Here they are.

MAIN GOALS
* Fit into my wedding dress again
* Be 60 Kgs again
* Participate in the Bridge to Brisbane run

MINI GOALS
* 85 Kgs - REACHED 7/3/2011 (84.6- 5 weeks)
* 80 Kgs
* 75 Kgs
* 70 Kgs
* 60 Kgs
* Size 18 Pants Comfortably
* Size 16 Pants Comfortably
* Size 14 Pants Comfortably
* Be able to walk into Target and get clothes without having to go to the big girl section
* Fit into my Maxi dresses and not have them stretching over my body.
* Buy clothes that fit from Fashion Fair

FITNESS GOALS
* Be able to do week 1 Day 1 of c25K
* Jog 500 m
* Jog 1km
* Jog 1.5 Km
* Jog 2 Km
* Jog 2.5 km
* Jog 3 Km
* Jog 3.5 Km
* Jog 4 Km
* Jog 4.5km
* Jog 5 KM

Do A Pushup

Week 5 - Weigh in Day

Previous Week: 86.5kgs
Current Weight: 84.6kgs
Lost this week: 1.9kgs

I'm feeling great this week. I picked up an exercise bike at the beginning of the week, and my bestie and I have being going for a nightly ride. She is much better at it than I am, but i'm sure giving it a go lol.

I was pretty slack on the walking front last week cause it was raining nearly every day, but I did do half an hour every day, some days even more, on the bike. I've had to become friends with a cushion though, cause man that seat is a killer on your butt.

I hadn't really noticed a huge difference in my fitness level at all, until today when i went for my walk. It was no where near as hard as it was 2 weeks ago, so that must mean my levels are increasing.

Yesterday saw my first (and 2nd) woohoo moments with clothing. Jayne had bought me a couple of denim skirts a couple of months ago, that at the time fit me perfectly. Yesterday however, it fell straight off me. There is no way I could wear it without a belt, and I don't own a belt lol. The 2nd moment was with a bra. I bought new bra's about 6 weeks ago. They were a good fit, maybe slightly big in the cup, to yesterday they didn't fit around the chest, even on the tightest setting, and the cups were noticeably too big. I'm not as thrilled with losing boob size as belly size, cause i'm pretty sure that's just gonna make them saggy ROFL.

The first 5 kgs......

HAS GONE! Woo Hoo! Weigh in this morning I was down to 85.4 which is a loss of 5.1kgs in 4.5 weeks.

I have never actively set out to achieve weightloss before, so this is huge to me. I mean I have "tried" but come on, everyone knows that you can't walk an extra couple of kms a week, continue eating the same sh!t and expect to lose huge numbers. Weightloss is 80% food and 20% exercise, and after the last month, I agree.

I've really only just started doing some exercise. My aim is to walk 3 times a week, and do half an hour on my exercise bike of a night time. The bike is a new addition, and well boy isn't my butt sore at the moment!

My bestie has set a challenge that she has to lose more weight than me, that i'm not allowed to beat her, so IT'S ON LIKE DONKEY KONG! BRING IT! She is pulling massive numbers on the bike though, i have no idea how i am ever going to be able to match her, she has legs of pure steel I swear! Our overall goal is to be at our goal by our 30th birthdays. Hers is in January though, and Mine is in June, both next year, so that seems a little unfair to her. I guess my goal is going to be at goal for HER birthday, so we can both look HOT! ROFL

Week 4 - Measurements Day

I'm kinda disappointed with measurements this week, although I'm not really surprised. I'm still feeling very bloated from AF and as you can see the figures kind of show it. I did however finally lose a decent number from my thighs, which is awesome.

On more upbeat news, though, i'm down to 85.8 this morning, which is only 300 grams from losing my first 5kgs. I haven't lost 5kgs before (being terribly sick doesn't count) so I'm thrilled!

Here's this week's chart (click to make bigger as always)

Struggle mountain....... Week 4 weigh in.

I'm REALLY struggling this week. Not necessarily with food, more lack of exercise, and the amount of guilt and generally feeling sluggish is getting to me. AF has been really bad as well, which i'm sure isn't helping my mood at all.

Weigh in today was pretty disappointing.

Last week: 87.1kgs
This Week: 86.5 kgs
Loss: 600grams

Pretty bummed about it, and need to work out a way of eating healthier when we are out. I'm not doing too well on that department at the moment :(

Sometimes being a girl just downright sux..........

I've never really taken a great deal of notice when chicks say they feel really bloated around the time they are due for AF, until now that is. See, I have the Implanon in my arm, so i'm not meant to get AF, but lately she has been coming quite often, like until a month ago when it was week on week off. YUCK

Well, Today she is back in full swing and boy don't I feel crappy. VERY bloated, and damn my body is holding on to everything for all it's worth. I Only lost 100 grams yesterday, only to put it back on today, and while i'm still down 500 grams from Monday, It still makes me feel a bit crappy. Made even worse by the fact that Darren is home this afternoon after 2 weeks away, Yeah good timeing AF. Grrrr

Have I mentioned how proud of him I am? He's down to 102, so only 2 kgs from goal. He sent me a picture of how much he's had to pull his belt in the other night (HEAPS) so I'm very excited to see him this afternoon, although i'm not really sure what to expect!

Week 3 - Measurements Day

I always dread measurement day. I think it is because I never feel like i have lost anything, as my clothes are not fitting any different really. I mean I can notice that my tummy isn't poking out further then my boobs as much as it used to, but i still don't feel too different.

I've been pleasantly surprised with the last 2 weeks measurements though, and was again this week as well. I've lost a further 12.5 cms off my body for a grand total of 31.5 in 3 weeks. I'm beyond thrilled!

Here's the chart (click to see bigger)


On another note, i'm so very proud of my husband. He has lost a massive 12.5kgs and is now only 2.5kgs away from his goal weight. Go Team Smith LOL

Weigh In Day - Week 3

Starting weight: 90.5kgs
Previous week: 88.8
Current weight: 87.1
This week's loss: 1.7kgs

My notes:
I'm actually concerned that I'm not eating enough, and not drinking enough water. I've never been a huge water drinker, so i think I might actively try to drink more. As for the eating, I'm eating more regularly than before I started this, I'm just limiting my portion sizes to what they should be, instead of HUGE like they were. I'm pretty much averaging 800-900 calories a day, and everywhere i read says that you should not go under 1200. I think i'm going to stick with what i am doing for a few weeks, and see how i go.

I've also started walking more, by going on a 2.5k walk after i drop the boys to school a couple of days a week. Going to slowly build up the exercise.

BLAH!

Yep it's one of those days and all I want is Darren home to deal with everything so I don't have to.

The little dog had to go to the vet this morning, so he could get desexed. The vet makes you feel so bad, and tries to take you for every penny you have got. Things are pretty tight for us on the cash front at the moment, with Darren being away, so then I get made feel bad cause I couldn't do all these 'extra' things for the dog. I'm sorry buddy, i just don't have an extra 300+ dollars laying around the place for things that aren't even necessary.

To make matters worse, Madi didn't handle leaving Buster at the Vet terribly well, and cried and cried and cried. Trying to explain to a three year old that he will be coming home, when he wasn't coming home with us then and there, is bloody hard.

I have to call the vet at 3 to see how he is going, and if he can be picked up yet. I'm dreading having to go down there again, i seriously am.

Weigh in this morning put me up 100g as well. I know 100g isn't really anything, but it stings. Everytime I see the scale go up i feel defeated. I know that I shouldn't weigh every day, but at the moment it is making me stay on track. Seeing those numbers drop 6 out of 7 days DOES make it worth is, and now i just have to get over the day it goes up slightly. 300grams and i'm down 1kg this week as well. Should be doable.

Still haven't got on to my list of goals. Must get on to that.........

Week 2

Weigh in day was on Monday. I was dreading it, and it sure did disappoint. 88.8kgs. 400 grams more than when I had left for Gympie on the weekend, and only 200 grams down from the previous week.

What's worse was that I knew it was coming, but still couldn't shake the feeling of failure. I tell you what though, getting back into it on Monday was fantastic, and I felt much better already.

Today is Wednesday, measurements day, and I weighed in again. down to 88kgs. That's a loss of 2.5kgs in 2 weeks and 2 days. Much happier with that. Measurements were down as well, with a loss of 12cms from my body. That brings it to a total of 19cms all up.

Here's the chart so you can see where it came from. (Click on it to make it bigger)

Concerned....

This week seems to have been a little harder for me to deal with, but I'm staying strong and sticking to my plan. It's been really hard for me to get out and go for walks this week, as it's been raining, but I still try and get at least one in, even if it is just walking to school to pick up the kids.

I wasn't going to do my measurements this week, as I don't feel that they would change a great deal, but I ended up doing them anyway, and I was pleasantly surprised.

I'm not sure if you can actually read that, but it says that in total I've lost 7cms from my body in week 1. I think it's a little strange that I am losing Cm's from one of my legs and arms but not the other as well lol.

Anyhow, the reason for this post was that I'm a little concerned about how the weekend is going to go. See we are going away to Gympie for the weekend to see our friends and family, so the cooking will be out of our control. The eating will still be in our control though, as is exercise, so hopefully we don't come back too much bigger.

Normally we would stop at one of the servo's on the way to Gympie and have tea there, but instead we are still going to stop and have dinner, but I am actually bringing dinner with us. I'm not too worried about Saturday night and Sunday as we are going to my friends for the night, and she is part of this lifestyle change too, so we should be good there.

She has bought herself an exercise bike to help her fit a little more exercise in, so i'm going to give it a go and see what i think. Darren says that I won't use it, just like the treadmill, and he's probably right, but hey, he doesn't use the home gym we bought for him either!

So I guess I will update you after my weigh in on Monday. I'm currently 88.4 (2.1kgs down) and hopefully it won't be too bad news :)

Week 1

Starting weight 31st January 2011: 90.5kgs
7th February 2011: 89.0kgs
Week 1 Loss: 1.5kgs

This hasn't been nearly as hard as I expected it to be, and I think i'm doing pretty well. I'm using a program called fatsecret to help me count my calories and keep me on track, and it appears to be working.

I'm still eating pretty much what I want, when I want, I'm just making sure that I don't go over my daily calorie limit.

I have been weighing myself every day, and I'm not actually convinced that is a good thing entirely as on Saturday I had a gain and was soooo dissapointed in myself. All I wanted to do was curl up and cry, which I did, But i also wanted to eat. I'm very proud to say though that I didn't, and I stuck to my limits.

This week has made me realise a couple of things already. 1) I was massively over eating. Dinner portions were way more than they should have been and 2) I am an emotional eater and I eat when I am bored. Both these things have obviously contributed to the massive weight gain over the years, and both are going to be worked on.

I am well aware of them now, and have made changes. Dinner is now in correct portions, and it is also being eaten slower. I don't go back for seconds or thirds, and you know what, I actually feel full after eating it.

The first day was torture, I was STARVING, 2nd day wasn't too bad, and by the 3rd day I was literally having to force myself to eat more.

This eating healthy thing though, is costing me a lot more money, especially with the price of fruit and veges after the floods and cyclones. It is definately cheaper to eat unhealthily, and I think that is a massive problem with today's society.

This week I took measurements and 'Before" photos, and I'm horrified at both results. I'm way too embarrassed to post them online for the moment, but it will happen one day.

Here's onto week 2!

The Beginning..........

Ahhh I don't even know where to start this, so I guess I should tell you a little about me and why i'm here.

I'm a SAHM to three kiddo's, who are 8, 7 and 3. In 2006 we lost our son Benjamin at 20 weeks pregnant. Burying your child would have to be the hardest thing we have EVER done, and I wouldn't want to wish it on anyone. It caused us a lot of heartache, and to this day, not a day goes by where I don't think about him.

On the 7th February, 2004 I married my best friend. I know people always say they are married to their best friend, but really he was. I had known him for nearly half my life, I had grown up with him, and we had never once had any kind of "i want to be more than friends" feelings, until I was pregnant with my oldest son.

I was going through a really nasty break up with my ex and I was pretty messed up emotionally. I think i cried nearly all day every day, and the only thing that kept me going was the life growing inside my tummy. At 9 months pregnant, I was at the local show, and I ran into Darren. We walked around the show for hours together, and I laughed like i had never laughed before. It had been so long since i had smiled let alone laughed, and it felt good. We stopped to watch the fireworks, and the baby was going nuts in my tummy everytime a bang happened. Darren wrapped his arms around me to feel the baby jumping, and that was the first moment I realised there was something there that had never been before.

Lachlan was born 2 weeks later, and within hours of giving birth, Darren was there sitting beside me, and continued to visit me every day while i was in hospital, and continued to keep me smiling. He saw Lachlan before his own father could even be bothered coming to see him. I couldn't for the life of me bring myself to admit to darren that I had different feelings. I mean who would want to be with a seriously messed up, fat single mother?

Darren continued being a massive support for me over the next 6 months, dropping in and seeing me, and playing with Lachlan. He also however, gained a girlfriend. Our fathers work together, so it was a normal occurrence to see each other at their work functions. He asked me whether i was going to the family chistmas party, which i was, and then told me that I would get to meet his girlfriend to see if i would approve. Holy rip my heart out and beat it with a stick.

Christmas party day came and i'm pretty sure Darren and I spend the whole day together and the girlfriend layed in the shed sleeping. We sat in his car and chatted for ages with Lachlan, and he took me for a canoe ride, threatening to tip me out.

The next day he came and asked me what I thought of his girlfriend. My reply "I don't like her, I think you should go out with me" Three months later, we were expecting our first child together. (GASP) 9 Weeks after Luke was born, I literally married my best friend.

Since then we have had lots of testing times, but the one thing that remains strong is our relationship. I battled with PND after Luke was born, Luke spent the first 12 months of his life sick and screaming due to having asthma. We lost Ben, Darren had to move to Brisbane for work, forcing us to live apart for 2.5 years, and only seeing each other on the weekends, fell pregnant with Madison and had a very difficult pregnancy with her. Lost one of my good friends that I grew up with due to epilepsy, and last of all me ending up in hospital on a life support system thanks to my gall Bladder, but that's a whole 'nother story.

I was always TINY growing up. I was always the shortest and smallest in the class. On graduation in year 12, I weighed a tiny 42kgs. Looking back on the photos now, I look sick, i seriously do, but that was just how I was. I ate like a horse, but i exercised a lot too.

When I started this weightloss journey, Iweighed 90.5kgs. More than double what i had left school at 11 years earlier. I don't ever want to be that skinny again, but i do want to be happy with myself. I weighed 60kgs on my wedding day and I would love more than anything to be able to fit back into my wedding dress. I want to be able to walk into a clothing shop and buy cool modern clothes, instead of having to head for the fat people section and dress in drabby clothes. Hell my mother wears more fashionable clothes than I do. It should be the other way around!

I know it sounds "cliche" but I want to be able to run around and play with my kids. I don't want to be the fat mum anymore. Lachlan was looking back at photos from when he was born the other day, and proceeded to tell me how skinny and pretty I was. (I was a size 10 after he was born) I know he didn't mean it to hurt, but wow it did.

Darren is currently working away in Adelaide again, so I only see him every 2nd weekend. I hate it more than anything and it's really really tough, on both me and the kids. about a month ago, after seeing how much weight one of our good friends has lost, he decided to give it a go too, so we are doing this together. His starting weight was 115kgs, and just over a month later, he's lost 8.5kgs and is just 6.5kgs from his first goal weight of 100. I think his overall goal is to be around 90kgs.

I've noticed a huge change in him. He is a lot thinner around his face, and his belly is starting to shrink. His pants are also a lot looser, and are starting to fall off him when he walks. I'm very proud of him, and he has given both me and my housemate the motivation to lose some weight.

We aren't doing any drastic diets, just watching how many calories we eat, and I'm slowly adding exercise to mine. Will update on the first week in the next post.

xoxo